Positive psychology, promoted by psychologist and researcher Martin Seligman, encourages individuals to adopt—you guessed it—a positive outlook on life. But not in the way that Instagram influencers often encourage toxic positivity. Benefits of positive psychology include increased self-esteem, improved relationships, and a better outlook on life. To me, those all sound like things we are very much in need of as we see to the start of 2021. This isn’t to ignore all the seemingly insurmountable negatives from the past year, however focusing only on those discounts the little moments that help us get through those huge, life-altering events that are usually out of our control. What we can do is tap back into personal strengths, gratitude, wellbeing, and feelings of hope, compassion, and optimism that motivate us to get through the day. 

Everyone feels sad sometimes. Sadness is a normal, healthy human emotion. We feel sad when we lose someone, when someone we love is going through a hard time, or when we are disappointed. We feel sadness when less significant things happen too- our favorite restaurant is closed, or it rains on a day we plan to be outside. Depression is not the same. It is a diagnostic term that means someone is feeling a combination of different symptoms that get in the way of normal, everyday functioning. Depression is sometimes used in place of sadness, but, in a clinical setting, these words are completely different. Sadness can be an aspect of depression, but both can exist on their own. 

But how can “bad” emotions be helpful?

Anxiety is the experience of excessive worry or nervousness related to life experiences. Many people experience anxiety in some form at some point in their lives. However, some people struggle with anxiety on a much greater scale and with greater frequency. People who have intense or frequent anxiety often feel misunderstood and belittled by those around them, and have a hard time describing what they might be feeling in order to ask for help. What is unhelpful to say to someone with anxiety? What might you say instead?

Do you ever feel like your mind won’t stop talking? Maybe you lie in bed at night thinking about something you said, something you did, or something that might happen tomorrow. That is called “overthinking”, and it can make you feel very tired, sad, or even scared.

You’re not alone. Lots of people overthink. The good news is, you can learn to quiet your thoughts and feel more calm. Let’s talk about what overthinking is, why it happens, and some simple ways to help your brain slow down.

Therapy is a common recommendation when someone discusses stress, anxiety, depression, or relationship issues. As therapists, we love to see therapy being recognized as a valid treatment option, as well as normalized to reduce stigma. We love hearing people talk about their experiences in therapy on social media and in casual conversation. But what about those of us who have never been to therapy before? What is it like? How do we know it’s a good fit? Is every session like the first session? What is going to happen?

Climate anxiety can both prevent and motivate people to address climate change through action. Different levels of climate anxiety have effects on motivation levels to act, which can ease the effects or address the causes of climate change. Surprisingly, some anxiety about climate change can be helpful in pushing us to take action, although too much or too little may result in not taking action at all.

The fear of missing out has predated social media, but not by much. Social media has thrown FOMO into the spotlight since everyone can experience a daily dose of seeing the highlights of someone else’s day. In fact, the more that people use social media like Facebook morning, noon, and night, the more they tend to experience FOMO. But FOMO doesn’t originate from social media use alone. It also comes from general unhappiness and life dissatisfaction.

A coping kit is simply a list of skills and strategies a child can use when feeling anxious. It helps to practice these strategies when the child is already calm. Sometimes children can memorize their list of strategies but others may need to have them written down.

Anxiousness is part of the normal and healthy range of human emotion, and having a fear response is designed to keep us safe. It becomes a problem when it starts to affect your daily life, such as your health, relationships, work, or school.

School refusal is different from truancy. Children who are truant refuse to go to school because they want to do something else. They will often concoct elaborate schemes to avoid going to school. However, school refusal is related to anxiety about situations or expectations at school.