You don’t need to fix or rescue your child from this situation. They got this. More than anything, they need you to believe they can handle anything that comes their way.

Young people need to understand anxiety is our brain's way of checking to see if we are okay, not to tell us that we aren’t okay.

Parenting well can feel like trying to hit a moving target. Parental involvement and responsiveness have been linked to child success, yet too much of either can have detrimental effects to children. So how do you know how much involvement and responsiveness is too much?

Spend time on any playground or park and you will hear adults (or even yourself) calling out to kids to “be careful”.  We have the best of intentions and just want to keep our kids safe.  We do not want our kids to get hurt.  The internet is at our fingertips, telling us all of the terrible things that can happen to kids.  We want them to be mindful of their surroundings.  However, as great as our intentions are, telling our kids to “be careful” can actually be harmful to them. Here are four reasons why we should stop telling out kids to “be careful” and what to say to them instead.  

According to growkidsminds.com, we talk to ourselves more than all other conversations combined. Self-talk makes up 80% of all of our communication! Self-talk is your internal dialog. It can be both negative and positive. What you say to yourself and how you say it matters. It influences how you feel and what you do. Positive self-talk is often a coping strategy we teach children (and adults) in therapy to decrease anxiety and depression and improve overall mood.

What if we could find a way to be fully present (mindful) and it feels as though we are getting to do something?  Guess what?  You can!  You can do this by intentionally looking for moments to savor throughout the day. Savoring is when we attempt to fully feel, enjoy and extend a positive experience. Savoring has been shown to have many of the same benefits of mindfulness including improving mood, leading to greater life satisfaction and increasing feelings of gratitude and appreciation. 

It is nearly impossible to stay current on all the apps that are presently available, let alone keep up on what is trendy, but “being in the know” is one way to protect your children online.  As we continue our social media blog series, let’s tackle getting familiar with the apps and platforms teens and children are using.

For some kids, problem solving comes naturally as they develop and parents give it little thought.  However, for other kids, it is something they need to be taught.  Almost all kids benefit from being taught such skills but kids diagnosed with ADHD and other developmental disorders especially benefit.  

Do you feel anxious when your child or teen is anxious?  Can you feel your own anxiety rising as your child retells an anxious event from their day?  In all likelihood, the answer is yes.  This phenomenon is called second-hand anxiety.  Second-hand anxiety simply means feeling anxious because someone else is anxious.  This happens because our brains are equipped with mirror neurons.  These neurons’ purpose is to imitate other’s movements and feelings. They help us learn just by watching someone complete a task.  They also allow us to feel what other people are feeling.  Studies have shown that observing someone expressing anger increases cortisol in the blood by 26%. 

Oftentimes, when dealing with kids, teens and even some adults, anxiety doesn’t present itself as them saying “I feel worried” but, instead, as behaviors.  These behaviors may include yelling, hitting, crying, kicking, and shoving. They may refuse to do what they have been asked, attempt to control the situation, or ask questions. Physical symptoms may include headaches, stomach aches, difficulty sleeping and isolating themselves. When working with an anxious child, it is important to see these behaviors as what they are: a form of communication.  Something has happened that has made your child’s brain feel threatened or unsafe and now the amygdala has taken over.